It’s happened. Yesterday was quite the day and fucking shit dude, I have so much to tell you.
Cut to context information if you’ve not already got this info yet. Charlie is one of The Sacred Mushroom Circle. An alter, in medical terminology, for the system however, he’s our calm, cool, and collected fuck boy. When Charlie is fronting, shit gets done and handled. He also is really good at stumbling over himself at the mere thought of Stardust but that’s another story. So, you’ve got your context, roll story.
Charlie had already taken over, and that boy does not tolerate people being in the way for no reason.
Let’s start with the beginning of the day. It was good. I ended work without a single call woot and it set the tone. I had an early ass appointment but not early enough. I swore I set it for 10 am but nah, ya girl set it for 10:30 so that was delightful. I get in, there’s this guy who is just standing there blocking the sign in sheet. Charlie had already taken over, and that boy does not tolerate people being in the way for no reason. After a few moments that man got the swift cane flash and “do you mind if I get to that sign in sheet so I can sit down? I really can’t stand very long” with that cheeky ass grin. I swear I wish I had Charlie’s confidence I’d probably be the empress of the universe. Anywhore. We get in our seat and shits decent again.
The nurse who called me back was absolutely adorable, just complimenting the fuck out of my croc slides, which TBH they are badass. She even took a photo of the Kuchi Kopi I have on there for her sister since her sister is a big Bob’s Burgers fan. The look on her face when I showed off my Linda Belcher tattoo, priceless.
TBH they are badass.
She of course asks if there’s any updates to the chart, which believe you me, there was a lot. This nurse took it like a champ too. She even updated the fact that they marked me as Hispanic, which I get it, my name looks like a classic Mexican dish but c’mon, I am whiter than white bread with no crust, covered in mayo used to eat sticky white rice. She’s got the updates going, she gets me to my room. Aaaand cue the hour wait. Charlie lost his patience. Started looking at the open computer available for prying eyes because, despite his claim that he’s not nosey, when he’s bored, he gets nosey as hell.
Finally, after three eternities we get to see the doctor. Adorable. Just like the nurse. Giant tortoiseshell glasses that were just slightly above mildly obnoxious. She mentions that it’s a follow up for blood work and out comes the cell phone with the giant list of shit I needed to happen. Charlie knew I was prepped to the 9s. He starts listing referral after referral, of course, she’s asking a brief why and then out comes the name of a specialist directed to the assistant nurse.
Finally, after three eternities we get to see the doctor.
Okay… Okay this is going a little breezier than Johnny boy’s visit. OH! Speaking of, tangent here. Charlie mentioned seeing ol’ Johnny to the nurse and expressed his extreme dismay of the fact that the fucker couldn’t even tell us his name, legit I thought he was a fucking nurse, and Charlie gets that look, you know the look, followed by ‘well we do things a little bit differently over here than Johnny and them do.’ Just perfectly what we wanted to hear. Exactly what we need.
So easy breezy beautiful referral after referral after FUCKING REFERRAL. She got every. single. one. Then he listed off the handicap plates that Heddy was going to write for us and kept write the wrong number for. Bam, Rx for the plates. This has to be an alternate reality. Then he mentioned off handed about wanting to do the genome testing for the treatment resistant depression we’ve been experiencing (since our cholesterol was up) and she goes “Oh, let me go grab that and you can do the cost estimate to see if you want to do that today.” I swear if Charlie hadn’t been hopped up on my 6-shot espresso he would have fainted.
I swear if Charlie hadn’t been hopped up on my 6-shot espresso he would have fainted.
All in all, each referral was handed out. We got our handicap plates that we’ve been begging for, so we don’t have to keep getting the stupid tags every 6 months. We got the genome testing. We even got the MRI read.
Speaking of. Not such good news. The worst that we weren’t trying to assume was reality. Full c-spine of degenerative disc disease. Full c-spine. As well, we have zero curvature in the c-spine. She ordered a thoracic spinal x-ray along with getting a referral to the spinal specialist but there’s a good (and by good, I mean almost certain) chance that we will need a full spinal from C to T to L MRI done to see how low the DDD goes and how bad it is all over. Hopefully they can knock me the fuck out because I am not prepared to get into that machine again. I don’t know what I’m going to do if it’s worse than non-surgical treatment.
Happy thoughts.
I did see my new therapist today. Let’s give her a name…….. Let’s call her Stormy. There was a storm going on during our visit, which she handled like a champion therapist. I will say, I was shocked at how young she was, I feel like a grandma confiding in her young Gen Alpha grandchild as I creak and groan about ‘back in my day we used to have to hang up the phone to get on the internet’. But I’m excited. It was super easy to talk to her and I’m hoping I can get comfortable enough to really get some work done. That 2025 audacity needs some fucking work done.
I know I haven’t been updating as much, and I plan to try to do more but it’s hard when your entire body and brain are on fire. I might just post a scream post if that’s cool on a day when I just can’t get the words out. Well, this is me, signing off. Ridi to the stars.
No, I don’t know why I said that. Shut up. Stop laughing at me.
Ridi
Traumatized Viridimere 